What Mercedes is struggling with is a shock for her. She has to find the Lord on her own terms, so she thinks she is torn into pieces and is trying to find out why. She has lost her job and has been forced into retirement, with a drastically reduced income. Now she's struggling to pay her bills, and her husband wants a divorce. She feels her whole life is falling apart. She is not the person she used to be. She does not want to wake up any more. And now she finds herself asking, "Where are you, Lord?"
